We encounter it all the time. Some person comes up to you and makes a comment about your body, weight or size. Maybe this person says something that hurts you, maybe he/she says something that leaves you really confused. I’ve heard a lot of crazy things in my life, things said to me and things said to people I know. So I thought we could dedicate this thread to crazy things people say in hopes that we will no longer let the things people say hurt us but rather laugh and make fun of those crazy comments.
I’ll start…(Please note that not all of these comments were made to me, but some of them were said to some of my friends or family, who relayed them to me).
“You’re not as BIG as you used to be!” (Mind you I was underweight at the time of this comment and have never been more than a Size 8 in my entire life).
“That shirt makes you look pregnant.”
“Hey you should go on the Biggest Loser! That might really help you.”
“You should just wear dresses.”
“Did you lose weight? You look so much better.”
“Wow! Those jeans look really baggy on you, good for you.”
“Are you losing weight? You’re getting so much prettier!”
“Don’t get any bigger.”
I think part of the reason people think that they can just say whatever about another person’s body is because we are being taught on a daily basis that weight is a public issue. We see it on television commercials, magazines and all kinds of advertisements. It is embedded into the fabric of so many of our conversations and it is a part of our collective consciousness. So, the next time people say something semi-insulting (or totally insulting) about your body, you might want to take the time to point out to them that their comments are crazy and they should find another topic.
Here are some of the gems I’ve had to listen to in the past. Anybody who tries to say things like that nowadays gets a “f*** you” or a “mind your own business”, depending on my mood that day).
“I’ve heard about this new pill that virtually melts fat away. Don’t you want to try it?” (The person was talking about Alli)
“Have you thought about trying WLS?”
“Wow, you’ve really grown tall! Watch out, or you’ll end up as tall as your father!” (I’m 5’11, my father is 6’1 or so; how am I supposed to control my height?)
“How are you able to do that, with your size?” (This was said to me by a total stranger. I was sitting on a bench with my legs crossed.)
Recently I was looking in the specialty-foods aisle of our local TJ Maxx…my cart was empty. I heard a voice behind me, apropos of nothing, say, “I must stick to my diet.” and then sigh. It’s like she saw my giant @ss and just couldn’t help giving herself a little motivational speech. I could almost hear her thinking, “…or I’ll wind up like THAT…
* : (
Later of course, I thought I could have said aloud to myself after I heard her: “I must remember to shut my rude mouth!”
Karin – that last comment is mystifying.
Hope505 – maybe she was just looking at some delicious specialty foods that were tempting her and it had nothing to do with you at all. At least I hope so.
After I lost about 15 pounds earlier this year, many people that I hadn’t seen since I was 15 pounds heavier commented positively on my weight loss. I was pleased with the loss, and the way in which the loss happened was sort of unusual so I was glad to talk about it, but I couldn’t help thinking: what if I actually had weight issues? What if I didn’t want to hear that I looked better thin? I mean, to some extent it’s just a compliment, like complimenting a new haircut or another apparent appearance change, but many people are sensitive and it just seems stupid to open your mouth about it.
There’s some loser who I’ve been passing on the sidewalk a few times in the last week. First time I was on foot, and he asked for $0.63. I rolled my eyes at him, and he started yelling about what did I have to roll my eyes about, I’m fat! I told him I can lose weight, but he can’t grow a brain. Or find a clue. Today I was on my bicycle, and he asked for 93 for a beer. I scowled at him, and he told me to keep being fat on my bicycle. I told him to go smoke some crack and get out of my neighborhood. If I see him again, I’ll just laugh at him, maybe throw a nickel into the street. What an asshat. I like how he thinks being a homeless loser is more desirable than being fat.
“Hey you should go on the Biggest Loser! That might really help you.”
My response would be: “Hey, you should really keep your stupid mouth shut. That might really help people to avoid smacking you!”
Gah. I hate judgmental people.
“Thank God your skinny!” (The woman in the seat next to me on the plane). And what if I wasnt??
“We don’t sell YOUR size in here.” Sneered at me in Victoria’s Secret, referring to my nonexistent breasts.
After I lost 100 lbs or so, I had a hard time buying clothes on my first outing doing so, because I wasn’t sure what size I was. I went into a Dress Barn and kind of wandered around, and a saleswoman asked if she could help me. Grateful for the help, I told her I didn’t know what size I was, and explained about the weight loss. She was astounded, and asked me, “When you’re that big, can you, you know, can you actually FEEL all that fat around you?” This was about 14 years ago and I can still remember her asking that. I told her yes, and you can actually FEEL people staring at you, too. And then I left.
I’ve had a number of airplane comments as well, like Joy. Those aggravate me…I am a struggling recovering anorexic, but I was for most of my life a very overweight person.
i can’t remember all the “helpful” comments i got when i was 200 pounds. but recently at 150, a co-worker was cleaning out her closets home and brought in a black moo-moo, saying she “thought it would work for me because it’s…forgiving”. well, forgive me, but it’s…ugly.
i love this post. i’m sure we could all gone endlessly.
comments from my relatives whom are wonderful people just very under educated in this area:
“I’m begging you to lose weight.”
“Ever since you moved to L.A. you got fat again.”
“If you looked like that (pointing to a picture of when i was really underweight) you would get a guy.”
” To wear boots you have to lose weight to look good.”
” Every time I see you, you keep getting fatter and fatter.”
” Lose weight so that you are healthy.”
Things i have heard others say:
” I have been eating like a health nut and exercising like crazy, but I’m not losing weight. I have to double my exercise.”
“I’m losing weight to feel better about myself.” ( i don’t buy this one a bit b/c no matter what weight you are you are never satisfied with your body that is a decision you have to consciously make for yourself and with the help of God i personally think)
“I took a break from exercising for to weeks…sigh…”(another person looks at her and says) “Well your tummy looks flatter.” (then she says) “really!”
Well, I had a pretty good day at early voting, yesterday.
First, a judge that was campaigning and had asked why I hide my “very beautiful eyes” behind my sunglasses (his words), the lady at the voting table was very amazed at my old license pic and the difference of how I looked from then and now.
Walking home past a “GoodYear” mechanic shop, one of the workers ran to the booth with the P.A. in it just so he could whistle at me and because I have to walk a long time on a busy street, I got a lot of cat-calls.
Now, I still got attention when I was heavier, it’s just that, why for ME does it take starving off 120 pounds (unintentionally, I didn’t have money to eat, long story) to get THAT much attention? And from cuter guys?
You prolly won’t approve thiscomment for reasons I understand, but I’ve said my piece, thanks!
1. You look like you have lost weight, which is good because you really needed to.
But what pisses me off more is.
2. Oh Dans going for a second helping…ah hahahaha.
Meanwhile my thin brother who is also getting a second helping and has eaten as much as me seems to not be subject to these jokes.
Hmmm. I wonder why?
my friend is getting married in a few weeks and she is a few months pregnant. when i told my roommate about the wedding her response was “isnt she going to be fat?!” as if that was a legitimate reason to not get married or put on a wedding dress. and no, shes not going to be “fat”, shes pregnant.
I was cooking and my roomate and her sister was gathered in the kitchen with me we started talking about splenda, equal, and sugar. So, me and the sister were talking about how equal is bad for you because of the ingredients and was wondering if splenda was probably bad for you too because anything that isn’t natural has bad chemicals. And I was saying maybe it isn’t so bad for you because it is a derivative of sugar. And all my roomate could say is “its zero calories though, its zero calories though!”
Here in Cebu, among regular people it’s actually weird (and is considered a sin) to pick on food. When a lot of tasty delicacies are in front of you and you are just staring into spacing and not even opening your mouth, you get a
“How come you’re not eating? Come on. Eat, eat, eat.”
Yet when one is noticeably gaining weight, people fondly tell you:
“Aww. Look at you. You must be so inspired and loved.”
(Yes, regular guys actually like their girlfriends to eat as much as they should.)
While I’ll be the first one to admit that it’s not less cruel here for people with weight problems, the reasons behind those are not just for the sake of aesthetics but more so for the worries about possible health concerns.
*** Keyword: regular – because I don’t know how it is with rich people
[...] This incident of course brings up the issue that we have talked about a lot on this blog which is the crazy things people say. [...]
“Hey man, you’ve gotten bigger since the last time i saw you…5 minutes ago
“Is that a pillow under your shirt or have you gotten fatter?”
(I walk up to my friend not seeing him for 3 years and he hasn’t noticed me yet…i tap him on the shoulder and he turns around and he doesn’t recognize me)
“Holy Shit!!”
I realize this is an older post but I’m new here and I can’t resist commenting on this.
There is one comment takes the cake(hah) of all the comments I have ever recieved. I was shopping for back to school clothing probably 10 years ago…so I was about 13 and awkward in that these aren’t really curves they’re just lumps that have potential to fill out really attractive pants way. Trying on ENDLESS pairs of pants. I want trendy and my grandmother wants a. economical and b. something that i can “grow into.” (trendy at the time were really big flares with glitter in the denim that rubbed off on everything your legs and butt ever touched) Regardless, nothing fits and I’m frusturated and upset. What does my grandmother tell me to make me feel better? (get ready for it)
“it’s okay honey, flares are for skinny girls.”
FLARES ARE FOR SKINNY GIRLS.
Its still haunting me 10 years later. I think it is why I own endless pairs of bootcut jeans and trouser jeans which look much better on me than flares. So in the spirit of optimism…thanks granny.Wish you would have put it another way.
Well I’m walking down the street to go to my friend’s house and there are these boys on the corner on skateboards and i hear one of them say very loudly “she’s a bit big” but get this! as soon i turn my back he’s saying something about my “hot bod” in my head i was sreaming do you like me or not? make up ur mind